Choose your ceramics below. Please be sure to note the size of each item...
​since all the photos are the same size they can be misleading! 
Taxes & glazing costs are included in the prices listed. 
​Please click here for Frequently Asked Questions.

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Please note: Rather than Dawn Knight, your PayPal / credit card receipt will list "Almassippi Players" as the seller - this is the name of the community theatre company I direct plays for (I usually sell our tickets through PayPal) so please ignore it! :)

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ALL funds raised from the 2018 Ceramo-rama Event
​go directly to FRC's Women's Empowerment Group
​to purchase supplies for Women's Shelters in Winnipeg.

And HEY:  

These prices are one heck of a deal!  Paint-Your-Own-Pottery studios like Brush Fire and Crock-a-Doodle charge $8/hour for glazing / studio time, plus you'll pay WAAAAY more for the bisqueware (the unpainted ceramic items)! 

Think I am exaggerating? Check out their websites for yourself!

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HOLIDAY ORNAMENTS / HOLIDAY THEMES:

You know what they say: no two snowflakes are alike. Well, in this case, that's a bold-faced lie. Every damn one you order will be the same.

SNOWFLAKE 
ORNAMENT
$5.00
3" x 3" x .25"

Ahhh, mittens. They're like gloves, but way less complicated. Give these lovely mitts new life by decorating them with fun patterns and colours. Or you can paint them tan and create some traditional Winnipeg Garbage Mitts!

​MITTEN
ORNAMENT
$5.00
3.5 x 3.8 x 0.25"

What the hell is this circle supposed to be? The earth? A cookie? A black hole left in your heart by a former lover? Here's the great thing about this ornament: YOU get to decide! Are you lazy as hell? Just clear-coat this sucker and call it a snowball!

CIRCLE 
ORNAMENT
$5.00
3" x 3" x .25"

Put a little romance into the holiday season with this precious heart decoration. Write your loved one's name on it, or just crazy-glue on a picture of your favourite kind of pizza. Mmmm. Either way, it's a total win.

HEART
ORNAMENT
$5.00
3" x 3" x .25"

Are you really into redundancy? If so, what better way to decorate your Xmas tree than... with a smaller Xmas tree! Wanna take it to the next level? Decorate this little ornament with a few more, smaller Xmas trees... it's TREE-INCEPTION!

TREE
ORNAMENT
$5.00
3" x 3" x .25"

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It's that time of year again. The time where you scavenge The V.V. Boutique (Value Village) to find the most horrifyingly tacky, gaudy sweater ever created, in order to proudly wear it to your office staff party. This ornament will let you live your wildest (sweater) dreams - by creating your own disgusting example of a fashion faux-pas. Once it's fired, you can add bells, glitter, felt, ribbon, or pom-poms - and give it away to the person you hate the most. Merrrrrry Christmas, ya jerk!

UGLY SWEATER
ORNAMENT
$5.00
 3.5 x 3.5 x .025"

This pudgy little deer has an adorably confused look on her face... maybe she's having an identity crisis? It she Dasher, or Dancer, or Prancer, or Vixen? Comet or Cupid or Donner or Blitzen? Is he Rudolph, the most famous reindeer of them all? Or is it Olive, the other reindeer, who ended up being a serious reindeer-bully? It's all your decision. Hey - you could paint on a little purple jacket and make him into Reindeer Prince, or paint his face with a glittery zig-zag and fashion your own Reindeer David Bowie.

REINDEER MUG
$12.00
​6.15 x 3.85 x 4.95"

Ho Ho Holy crap, Santa has put on some weight. Luckily, his round little body is a perfect shape to hold a good amount of your favorite hot apple cider, five servings of maple-flavored whisky, or even just a handful of pens from your junk drawer. Santa might be teetering on the edge of a massive coronary, but you'll benefit from his overwhelming waist-to-hip ratio by saving trips back to the kitchen for refills!

SANTA MUG
$12.00
5.05 x 3.65 x 4.25"

This ultra-sleek, ultra-modern Holiday Tree is SO very 21st Century. It's ideal for someone who loves Christmas but also hates all the mess of an actual Xmas Tree. It's smooth, it's modern, and it won't shed needles on your living room floor. Add a few drops of pine-scented-oil inside and make all your holiday dreams come true.

MODERN
​CHRISTMAS TREE
$30.00
5.5 x 5.5 x 9.85"

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DINNERWARE

Don't be distracted by its fuzzy, woolen appearance... this tumbler won't make you itchy, shrink in the wash, pill or stretch. This baby might look just like it's made of shetland wool, but it's as solid as rock and way, way less absorbent.

COZY SWEATER
​TUMBLER
$10.00
3.5" X 3.5" X 6"

Have you ever wanted to drink hot chocolate out of a sweater that your Irish Granny knitted? Well, here's your chance, buster! What's better on a frigid wintery night than a hot chocolate with a shot of Bailey's? Drinking it from mug that looks like it just rolled out of the clothes dryer, that's what!

COZY SWEATER
MUG
$10.00
5.25" X 3" X 4"

Any person who works with kids knows the value of a good cup of coffee. Make sure your mug never makes it into the 'random ugly mug' cupboard in the FRC staff room, by personalizing this classic beauty.

16 OZ. MUG
$10.00
($20 at Crock-A-Doodle)
4.25" x 3.5" x 5"

Do you have giant sausage fingers? Or have you always wanted to confess your love for someone through dinnerware? You can't go wrong with this cute mug. Not only does it have a hidden heart in its form, but the space between the handle and the mug makes this little number great for people with thick, unruly digits that don't work with most delicate drinkware.

HEART MUG
$8.00
​4.5" x 3.25" x 3.75"

This weird container has no handle, and looks like it's three-sheets to the wind. It's like the ceramic version of Cousin Eddie from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Yeah, it looks really tipsy... but unlike Cousin Eddie, it's quite stable.

WONKY
​VESSEL
$8.00
3.75" x 4" x 4"

Tea drinkers unite! What are you looking for? Creativi-tea? Clari-tea? Sereni-tea? Whatever your aim, throw your pinky in the air and wave it around like you just don't care... because this mug's special sexy string-holder is a helluva well-designed novel-tea!

TEA BAG MUG
$12.00
4.75" x 3.35" x 5.25"

Behold! This roughly-hewn mug is the perfect way to say "I like pottery" without actually requiring any skill, talent or effort on your part. Its faux-thrown ridges suggest a hand-made quality, so this little gem will look glorious even with a shoddy, half-assed paint-job.

NATURE
​MUG
$10.00
​5.3" x 3.6" x 4.3"

During the age of the Black Plague, traditional "beer steins" had lids, to prevent diseased flies from getting into the beer. Thankfully, you live in Manitoba in the 21st Century, so the worst you'll ever experience is a mosquito accidentally nose-diving into your fancy mug. Let's face it... you don't need to be German to appreciate this lovely stein.

BEER STEIN
$15.00
5.75" x 3.8" x 6.5"

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Yeah, it's the perfect size and shape for cereal - but listen up, Jacko - nobody tells this bowl what to do. It's 2020, for goodness' sakes. Stop it with the labels, already. THIS BOWL CAN BE WHATEVER IT WANTS TO BE! You'll never find another bowl that is so confidently ambiguous.

CEREAL BOWL
$10.00
($20 at Crock-A-Doodle)
6.25" X 6.25" X 3.25"

In this case, form and function are barely co-habitating. Wide enough to comfortably hold a medium-sized cat, and just shallow enough to be the worst choice EVER for hot soup, this piece has it all. It's empty and it's unlikely to ever talk to you - and with its round, full bottom, and its sleek lines, this piece is essentially the Kim Kardashian of serving ware.

​LARGE
​SERVING BOWL
$25.00
(Or experience highway robbery for $46 at Crock-A-Doodle!)
11" X 11" X 3"

It's smooth. It's round. It has no texture, sharp edges or details. If it was a food, it would be milk toast. But the greatest thing about something that's so boring is that you know that whatever you do to it would be an improvement. Build up your self-confidence by transforming this bland piece of serving-ware into something delightful. Minimalism is for losers!

ROUND
​CHARGER
$20.00
13" x 13" x 1.5"

Do your guests get confused about which dip goes with which appetizer? Make things easier for even the slowest of houseguests, by forcing them to assimilate with this strategically-named, all-in-one snack dish. God forbid you leave them to their own devices... who's gonna take the blame when your uncle Marty jams his pork spring roll into a bowl of strawberry Cool Whip? Guh! That's just gross.

CHIP & DIP
​PLATE
$20.00
12" X 9" X 2"

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RANDOM FUN

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Let's face it. This robot looks just as uncomfortable as you feel on a daily basis. Commemorate your social awkwardness and future financial security by collecting your loose loonies and toonies in this sweet, sweet robot bank.

AWKWARD
​ROBOT BANK
$10.00
​3.5" x 3.5" x 6.5"

People in Mexico celebrate Dio de los Muertos - the Day of the Dead. This multi-day holiday focuses on gatherings of family and friends to remember friends and family members who have passed on, and help support their spiritual journey. You can use this mug to support your own spiritual journey into caffeination each morning.

SUGAR SKULL
MUG
$10.00
5.35" x 4.5" x 4.15"
LIMITED STOCK

Unlike feudal wars, the burning of witches and the bubonic plague, there are SOME things that shouldn't have stayed in the middle ages. You don't have to be a Lannister to relish in a gulp of ale from this posh-looking cup! You can finally start acting like the fancy lord or lady you are with this snazzy old-school goblet!

GOBLET
SOLD OUT
4.24" x 4.25" x 7.75"

Remember when you were little and your mom got mad at you, put her hands on her hips and used your FULL NAME while giving you the what-for? Well, this sassy little vase looks like it SERIOUSLY CAN'T EVEN. It's got a 1:4 waist-to-hips ratio and sassy little handles to boot.

TUSCAN
​VASE
$15.00
6" x 6" x 7.5"

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This winter, help fight your seasonal affective disorder by living your life like you're in the tropics. If you're like me, you can't afford a trip to Costa Rica but you don't want to miss out on the beauty of an sunshiney beach... paint your own realistic ceramic pineapple!

PINEAPPLE 
​BOX
$15.00
​4.7 x 4.7 x 7.5"
LIMITED STOCK

Do you want constant reminder that you're on a diet and shouldn't consume any sweets? This charming donut box (with sprinkles!) is a great addition to any dieter's décor. It has just enough room in it to hide about 15 Jujubes, 20 Caramilk squares, or (FINE!) nine chunks of dry, crusty, tasteless Weight Watchers(TM) Coconut Candy. Just sayin'.

DONUT BOX
​WITH SPRINKLES
$10.00
3" x 3" x .25"

For those of you trying to save your quarters, here is a sweet little cupcake change bank. There's a hole (with a plug) in the bottom to hold your money inside - so you can quickly shake it out if you run out of change trying to pay for your double-double in the Tim Horton's Drive Thru.

CUPCAKE
BANK
$10.00
3.5" x 3.5" x 4.25"​

GAH! It's a cupcake box! The top comes off and you can put small things inside! Cute as a button! COMPLETELY ADORBS! Note: This cupcake is ceramic and not edible (without a need for emergency hospitalization).

​CUPCAKE
BOX
$10.00
3.25" x 3.25" x 4.75"

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Does a small animal currently live in your home? This bowl is an appropriate size to hold food for anything from an overweight gerbil to a small labradoodle. If you're feeling frisky, maybe you could get two - because no matter whether you're housing a domesticated grey squirrel or (God forgive you) one of those fur-snakes that the animal-rights-activists call 'ferrets', it's fairly likely your little buddy deserves (at the very minimum) a matching set of stylin' chow dishes.

SMALL PET DISH
$12.00
($28 at Crock-A-Doodle)
6.25" X 6.25" X 2.75"

Inspired by beautiful seashells from exotic places you'll likely never afford to visit, this fluted vase is a magnificent way to liven up any dull space. Slap on an ocean-inspired glaze and WHAMMO! Your living room is a goddamned island paradise! (Cue the ukulele music!) Pass me a Mai-tai, Carlos! IT'S HOT OUT HERE!

BENDY
​ORGANIC VASE
SOLD OUT
5" X 5" X 8"

<=== That other vase seem too bendy and angular? Too over the top? Hell yeah it is! That thing is crazy AF! If you're more likely to enjoy a slice of light mozza on melba toast than a spicy jalapeño popper dipped in chipotle, maybe this less bendy, tamed-down version is more your vanilla style.

SLIGHTLY
​LESS BENDY
​ORGANIC VASE
SOLD OUT
​4.5" X 4.5" X 9"

What's the use of eating breakfast, if it's not an adventure?! This one's for those of you who like slurping cereal out of your laps. The effectively-placed holes in this deep bowl allow just the right amount of milk and Grape Nuts to plummet to the ground - and are whimsical and decorative to boot. Or you can just use this to hold a ball of yarn while you knit. Whatevs.

KNITTING /
​YARN BOWL
SOLD OUT
​6" X 6" X 4.5"

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* These bowls are for demonstration purposes only. Cats not included.